Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Kya aap Musalmaan hain?

On our very first day in Islamabad, a Pakistani official, who had just returned after a stint in New Delhi, was surprised to hear that I am Muslim.

“Paidaishi Musalmaan hain, ya shaadi kar ke ho gayeen?” he asked me at a dinner meant to welcome us to Pakistan. Without any trace of embarrassment, he continued, “I asked because aap ke yahan to sab chalta hai na… (referring to mixed marriages in India).”


“By birth,” I replied, staring at his drink. He changed tack. “In Islamabad we use gas heaters,” he said, pointing towards a gas-fired water heater outside our home.

Our Muslimness has been post-mortem-ed scores of times since. Most Pakistanis usually have that shock-and-awe look when it dawns on them that we are Muslims: “Par aap to India se hain na?” or “Aap lagti to nahin hain.”


Some others give us a warm hug, “Arrey aap to hamarey Musalmaan bhai hain” (that one truly makes my husband cringe); and many break into the predictable rant: “Musalmaanon ki haalat India main achchi nahin hai, hamein unki bahut fikar hai”, or worse, “Aap pehle se Musalmaan they, ya yahan aakar huye?”


If that wasn’t enough, the ‘bhais’ from the intelligence agencies often scale us on our religiosity – trying to find out if we read the namaz, keep fasts during Ramzan and drink (that’s over and above their all-important dossiers on our favourite veggies and pulses compiled by following us on each and every visit to the grocers).


In India, religion never propelled our associations, neither did anyone make us so aware of our Muslimness. Of course, I got told plenty of times that I don’t look Muslim, mostly thanks to my gene pool (my rather unusual name is also confusing), but it never sounded like an accusation.


I am unusually high on patience and usually smile my way through such chatter, telling most people that there are more Muslims on the other side of Wagah. But my husband doesn’t.


Once I heard him tell the anchor on a TV show: “India has had three Muslim Presidents, one of the richest men of India is a Muslim, and of the two Indian journalists posted in Pakistan, one of them (my husband) is a Muslim, so we really are doing fine.” I found his argument quite convincing.


I had thought I had seen it all till I was referred to Islamabad’s biggest privately run hospital for suspected appendicitis some time last year. After the doctor saw “Indian” on my form, she announced, “Ajmal Kasab Pakistani ho hi nahin sakta…”


Then she saw my Muslim surname and said, “Muslim?” I said, “Yes.” “We worry about the Muslims in India. Look at the Muslims in Gujarat…” she said, breaking into a long monologue, oblivious to the fact that I was wriggling with pain and hoping she would get on with her examination.

42 comments:

  1. HI

    Its really sad that ppl still identify on basis of religion...

    I saw your blog last week nd i went thru all the articles you wrote till date... Simply awesome... No mirch no masala.... really appreciate that simplicity... will be reading on...

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  2. hahahhaha this is so bloody typical of the Pakis, they call all Indians 'baniyas' I dont there is a single modern state on earth except Pakistan which puts so much stress on thier relegious identity , a few months ago I read a column by AJ Akbar in the Times of India , wherein he says that all muslims in India should be glad that they are not born in Pakistan... So much pressure from the state abt one's religious identity is the reason Pakistani are in such a mess today... yes one can argue that its their definition of there identity vis-a-vis India ... but still if they do not change thier outlook soon there is going to be hell to pay for both India and Pak... Keep up the good work, maybe someday you shall share your name with us lol...til then cheers...:)

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  3. I guess in the Pakistani imagination, the country is the product of the efforts of *all* Muslims of the sub-continent. Hence, in a sense, being Muslim and Indian are incompatible. (Of course, not all Pakistanis think this way but I suppose enough do.) A Muslim who also claims to be Indian thus poses a problem.

    The late Pakistani Brigadier Siddiq Salik - he who wrote the wonderful "Witness to Surrender" - had a wonderful way of addressing this problem in a later book about his experience as an Indian Prisoner-of-War. According to him, all Muslims in Indian fall into one of two categories:

    (1) Those who are deeply unhappy in India and who long to escape to Pakistan,

    (2) If a Muslim doesn't fall into category (1), then he/she has been "brainwashed" by the Hindus.

    Problem solved, as they say. Brigadier Salik, incidentally, was killed in the same plane crash that also killed General Zia-ul-haq.

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  4. It is a question of ignorance. Pakistanis in India might get asked some peculiar questions with respect to their country too.

    I applaud you both for doing your best to present your point of view to people who have never seen an Indian Muslim before.

    Your blog is now my favorite out of the scores I read regularly.

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  5. In Pakistani schools, apparently they dont teach a word called "Subtlety".

    "aap ke yahan to sab chalta hai na"

    was crude..gross..Jesus Christ! Even if all their assumptions of how minorities are treated is true, this totally cross the red line.
    Is this a way to talk to someone coming from another country..
    I mean the article was very funny..but I couldnt laugh.Makes me cringe. Arrrrgh! :-(
    You ppl have to b given some Indira Peace Prize award for putting up with this posting.
    Yikes! Anyway..Admire your people's self-esteem & sporting spirit.
    Awesome write up though..

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  6. Absolutely enjoyed reading this post and I'm glad I found this blog :) Thank you!

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  7. Like how many Indians have stereotypes of Pakistan, there are also many stereotypes of India in Pakistan and for the most part being Muslim doesn't come into or if it does then you're more than likely poor and downtrodden...

    This is the product of state propaganda, media etc... your being in Pakistan breaks all the stereotypes... I know it will probably irk the hell out of your husband, as you guys will be asked this wherever you go... but in all honesty you are actually breaking barriers and decades old moulds and stereotypes, you are actually doing India a big service by showing its true secular nature - Indians in Pakistan who happen to be Muslim...

    The Muslim bhai bhai things irks me too along with the Ummah thing... i have more in common with other Punjabis (of any faith) than i do with an Arab or Indonesian...

    Chalo each to their own!

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    1. I have always wondered about the Ummah concept. I know its a deeply religious thing but I simply cannot get my head around it - I mean I get universal brotherhood / sisterhood of all humans but a community of worshippers of one God, like an exclusive club based on religion really does my head in...

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  8. When will they change?Haven't they seen "Khuda key liye" yet??

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  9. Soch, thanks for reading :)

    Premal, Kannan, Kals thanks.

    Anonymous 1, that was a very interesting piece of information. Thank you.

    Anirban, do keep reading.

    Anonymous 2, yes, to each his own.

    Anonymous 3, :)

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  10. Just check Pakistan's school textbooks. They teach their kids to hate India.

    Pakistani leaders have created full three Generations based on this ideology of hate.

    As a good example, Maria B is a famous fashion designer in Pakistan. Well, even educated elite like her is funding public conferences by an Extremist called Zaid Hamid.

    But there is one difference. If you goto street and ask the poor punjabis in Pakistan, they love India. Same with Balochis, Pashtuns who are dying under Punjabi army of Pakistan.

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  11. The Pakistani society is obsessed with their religion and jealosy towards India. Just now, for example, they are out there in USA trying to get equal with India on the Nuclear deal.

    Fortuanately all the timewhile they remain trapped in their Mediaval mentality India is moving fast at tremendous growth rate towards World dominance along with China. Indians are not obseessed with religion and are progressive and highly competitive. Indian women, 50% of our population are also making great advances.

    I only wish that the pace of development in the villages, especially in North India was faster!

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  12. You know I noticed growing up that the Babri Masjid catastrophe was sort of a watershed in terms of religious identity in India. I was in college at the time. Suddenly kids and youngsters were discussing which religion one belonged to. It had never been the case before. But I'm glad it isn't so very deeply ingrained in us as a people. It comes and goes, peaking during violent outbreaks of religious animosity. Mercifully, it passes.

    Incidentally, one of my sons is named Kabir and that causes a certain amount of confusion in some people's minds. They aren't sure whether we're Hindus, Sikhs or Muslims! And I quite enjoy keeping them in suspense for as long as I can!

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    1. Rupa, So true. I wanted to name my son Sarfarosh, got vetoed by my hubby who wanted a bengali name but I agree, I don't get this whole identity based on religion alone. Surely we all are more than that?

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  13. A country is made up of its people - and looking at the condition of Pakistan, one knows what kind of guys are they. They can't contextualize the openness in India.

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  14. God!with a drink in your hand you ask such a question!!!

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  15. I think certain cliche notions would always exist, the gap has become so wide that theres a major lack of understanding...

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  16. Rupa, I know what you mean. We have a similar case in the family. Its fun to keep them guessing :)

    Ranjini, as always, thank you!

    A New Beginning, yes, with a drink in hand, that too in the month of Ramzan!

    Indra, to be fair, not everyone is like that. But some of them can certainly do with an education.

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  17. This is so true. I am an Indian Muslim who lives in the US, and used to be asked similar questions all the time. Pakistanis have such misconceptions of India (and Indian Muslims). If on any historical/religious topic, I would disagree with them, they would say I am brainwashed by India - common, can't I have a different thought process?.

    To be fair, I have met many Pakistani gems who are great friends and best at heart. I guess every nationality / ethnic group grows up with certain pre-conceived notions, a product of their common education. I grew up thinking Pakistan was extremely backward (as used to be portrayed in the Indian media), but was surprised to learn about the big industries and the progress of some sections of that society.

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  18. @Taha, thanks again for reading. As always, you make a valid point. We have met many Pakistani gems too and made some very, very good friends.

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  19. Your blog is contributing to bursting stereotypes. More power to your pens (or should that be keyboard!?) :)
    I grew up in Hyderabad (AP or Deccan, not Sind) and had friends who holidayed with family in Pakistan. It was always so unreal to listen to them talk of 'normal' life there. We thought every woman was in deep burqa and was house-bound. Further, also surprising was the number of Hindus and Sikhs still voluntarily in Pakistan. We assumed everybody had gotten out when they could.

    Your blog has a dedicated follower in me.

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  20. @SavPune, thanks for reading. and spread the word :)

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  21. Pakistan's and the average Pakistani's obsession with India will prove to be the ruin of that country.

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  22. I've never met a people so obsessed with ethnicity as Pakistanis. One thought Indians were bad that way ('What is your caste ?') but the Pakistanis take the cake ! Of course they'll ask you your ethnicity right away. And they have to know where any third person comes from, his religion, caste etc. All Indian film stars, sportsmen, political leaders have to be identified right away.

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  23. indian muslims do fall into two kinds muslims and so called muslims and the so called are realy dangerous then any hindu/jew we can talk to a jew/hindu but not the types srk or tabu

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  24. Interesting post. However, as an Indian Muslim, I think I have a different take on sentiments expressed by your husband. I think the concerns Pakistanis are expressing for the Indian Muslims are quite well placed and warranted, their intentionality notwithstanding.
    Also the 3 Presidents argument is rather lame. An Indian Muslim is yet to win a state wide election in India (except J&K) and that tells you something about the Indian electorate. We do know that the Chief Ministers who organize violence against Muslims are usually re-elected by overwhelming majorities.
    The Muslims in India are extremely poor and marginalized. 2006 Sachar committee report obviously is a pretty good indictment of the 'Muslims in India are doing so well' argument, in spite of how many more billions the Wipro dude accumulates.
    Let the federal and state governments of India first protect the basic life, liberty and property of the Mussalman in India before we start talking about ‘how well’ the Muslims are doing in India.
    I think the complicity of government actors in destroying the life, liberty and property of the Mussallman in India is proof positive of the tragedy that is the life of Muslims in India. Also let’s not chalk this up to 'sectarian violence', 'riots', or whatever other euphemistic jargon is in vogue these days as poor attempts at masking what really happens in India. What happens is mass violence directed at Muslims where the State actors plan, organize and executes the violence. The government is not just an active accomplice, but a key participant. Gujarat was not the first state sponsored violence against Muslims. Gujarat was the first state sponsored violence which got put up on evening news. Muslims in Bombay, Surat, Meerut, Bhagalpur, Moradabad and countless other cities all suffered the same fate though without the prime time coverage that Gujarat received.
    I have not read your whole blog and got here from a link at a different blog. I don't know about yours or your husband's life circumstances and what pressures you are under to tow a certain line and I certainly don't mean to be rude by disagreeing with you in such strong terms. As journalists, maybe you guys could research why shit like this happens to the Muslims in India:

    ‘On that tragic day, May 22, 1987, the PAC personnel cordoned off Hashimpura — located in the middle of Meerut – and picked about fifty innocent Muslim men between the age group of 70 and 10 from three out of four lanes of the locality. The fourth lane inhabited by Hindu families was left. Nasir was one of them. Nineteen PAC personnel, under platoon commander Surinder Pal Singh, took about 50 Muslim youths, most of them daily wage labourers and poor weavers, in a PAC truck from Hashimpura to the Upper Ganga Canal in Murad Nagar, Ghaziabad, instead of taking them to the police station. They shot them dead in cold blood and threw their bodies into the canal. The PAC personnel then drove ahead in their truck to the Hindon Canal in Makanpur and shot dead several other Muslim youths they had taken with them. Two of the persons who survived the Hindon Canal massacre and managed to escape lodged an FIR at the Link Road Police Station. One of the four others who managed to escape the massacre at the Upper Ganga Canal filed an FIR at the Murad Nagar police station’

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  25. I know I am going to regret responding to your tripe but here goes:

    The Muslims in India are extremely poor and marginalized. 2006 Sachar committee report obviously is a pretty good indictment of the 'Muslims in India are doing so well'

    This is something that irritates me, that all the blame for the fact that the bulk of the Muslim community is poor today is put on the governments of post-independence India.

    But were all Muslims doing well in pre-independence India? Leave alone the British Raj were all Muslims rich under the Mughal Raj? Or the Delhi Sultanate? Or the many "Muslim" kingdoms in the subcontinent? Or for that matter, the Muslim paradise that is presumably current-day Pakistan?

    News for you, old chap. The partition of India saw most of the well-off Muslims in what is now India move to Pakistan. Those remaining behind were therefore - you got it - largely the poor.

    It is not my claim that things are great for Muslims in India. Surely not. But you have to recognize that the status of Muslims in India was not great on the eve of Independence - the bulk of Muslims were poor even then. So were the bulk of Hindus. Now, if you want to claim that poor Hindus have done better than poor Muslims in post-independence India, that's different but I am not aware of such an analysis, not even by the Sachar committee.

    The Sachar committee gathered a huge amount of data but actually doesn't do a great job of *analyzing* the data. For a critique, see Steven Wilkinson's article "A Note on the Analysis in the Sachar Report" published in the Economic and Political Weekly, volume 42, Number 10, 2007.

    Secondly, you just treat all Muslims as a homogeneous lot which is very far from being the case. The following excerpt from Wilkinson's article may interest you:

    In fact, on many measures, Muslims are doing better in western and southern states than they are in the rest of the country. Just to give one example, although in general Muslim literacy rates are below the Indian average, in 10 of the 21 states studied (including Maharashtra, Gujarat, Andhra Pradesh and Karnataka) Muslim literacy rates are actually higher than average (SCR: 53). So there is clearly something that is state- or region-specific that seems to be making a major difference to Muslims' life chances.

    (SCR = Sachar Committee Report)

    As journalists, maybe you guys could research why shit like this happens to the Muslims in India (snipped)

    It's been done by quite a few and the work continues. I don't suppose you're interested at all but in the unlikely event you are, try Paul Brass' book The production of Hindu-Muslim violence in Contemporary India. For a different approach, try Steven Wilkinson's Votes and Violence: Electoral Competition and Ethnic Riots in India. See also the exchange between Pratap Bhanu Mehta, Ashis Nandy and Akeel Bilgrami, esp. beginning 3:15 into the clip:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GNHqJCaLd6Y&feature=related

    A final remark: Yes, shit happens and will continue to happen for the foreseeable future. There are also people fighting (often against considerable odds) to ensure that transgressions are punished and that they don't happen in the future. But the attitude in your comment is that it's someone else responsibility to fight for a just Indian society. You are apart from the society you critique despite your claim to be an "Indian Muslim."

    I have seen this type of "academic" critique before. It's the stereotypical Pakistani criticism of India. From Indians, it's usually the prelude to settling in some "phoren" country. Settled abroad, or thinking of moving there, are you? Do so, but spare us your sanctimony.

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    1. Too good :) Loved it... however, must say I am getting a bit appalled by the large number of idiots on the Internet from the Indian side who seem to be provoking Pakistanis. what's going on? Something I was not aware of...

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    2. Another thing - that comment about everyone being part of your own country and therefore should be working towards improving it... bang on target. if its your home, fix it. the structure is there. Agreed there flaws but fight for your rights... Last I checked you do have the free press, judiciary and social mobility

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  26. Anonymous who posted at 4-1: Not sure what my location outside India has to do with the merits of my argument. Anyway, I am busy right now. I am going to come back this weekend to deconstruct your sophist apologia about Muslim persecution in India. If interested, you can reply, though I mostly want to clarify for the readers who might get swayed by your academic name dropping pretense.
    Btw, I am familiar with the works of Wilkinson and Paul Brass. Why you would cite Paul Brass to refute me is of course a puzzle to me. Thanks for the youtube link. Will watch the whole thing later as it looks interesting. In the meantime, you can read this piece by another American academic, Martha Nussbaum, on the sick and perverted obsession of the Hinduvta brigade with the sexuality of the Indian Muslim:
    http://bostonreview.net/BR29.3/nussbaum.html

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  27. Anyone who believes that Pakistanis' concern for Indian Muslims is genuine or warranted is an imbecile.

    There are different sections of Indian society that are poor and Muslims are just one of them. That is just about it. IT is NOT BECAUSE they are Muslims in India, that they are poor. It is because of their own customs - of not wanting to educate their children, having multiple children when they cannot afford to support even one etc.

    Permanent paranoia that Hindus are out to get them is also a reason. If all the Indian Muslim Leaders had done even a little bit to improve their lot since 1947, their situation would have changed, in addition to all that the government does.

    Instead of continuously finding fault about others, if these [self-centered] Muslim writers did a little bit to improve their own community, it would be great.

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  28. Justice Warrior,

    That you quote a leftist hinduphobe like Martha Nussbaum as an authority, reflects your mindset. She has not lived in India, nor understood the reality of what happens here. Instead, she has taken up the great cause of the Left in ascribing all the faults to hindutva - and of course, her mentor is the left leaning Amartya Sen, he of the great India never had anything like a Hindu civilization quote. That you quote such a loon as an authority, quite shows that reality and truth dont matter a whit to you, its merely a crutch to support your bias. For as many riots Hindus commit, Muslims commit as many and in fact, routinely engage in violence over the flimsiest of reasons. My own friend narrowly escaped a lynching after Friday prayers in a muslim neighborhood for merely asking a muslim youth to stand aside. Unfortunately, there were no AFP photographers to take his pic begging and pleading for his life, from the mob to make him a cause celebre.

    In essence the creeping fundamentalism in many Indian Muslims, wherein they come up with any and every sort of obnoxious attack on other religions, try to shift blame for their condition on others and then post behind lofty names like Justice Warrior and what not. Unfortunately, the likes of the amazing lady who host this blog appear to have limited influence. Most of the folks one sees online, on TV shows and academia are all shrill bigots like you are, using hinduphobic articles and propoganda to always support the Islamist cause, albeit trying to make maximal use of the secular Indian state. Thanks to the antics of folks like you, even rabid secularists like me, who in their youth often took up cudgels against anyone who doubted the antics of Indian Muslims, have now been forced into introspection mode about the manner in which you blame other communities for all your parochial ills, and then hide behind the convenient mask of being a minority or being unbiased.

    I do hope the likes of "me" who runs this blog, and her husband become more popular in this country which I live in and will continue to live in, unlike you. They are a far sight better than the Martha Nussbaum quoting sophists like you.

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  29. I think its a problem in india too... Muslims are really type cast (read sterotyped) and often subjected to discrimination. Look at the recent issue in which an orthodox typically looking muslim guy who was wearing a skull cap and have a long beard was offboarded from a Emirates flight on the suspicion of being a terrorist. a stupid lady(co-passenger) heard him as saying ab plane Uddne wala in typical urdu slang. they arrested him and put him in custody for 30 hrs... later released as no evidence found against him...

    This is the height of sterotypeing, discrimination against muslims and a clear human rights violation.

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  30. Got here via silverine. Interesting read.

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  31. OAgree with justice warrior, three presidents does not mean anything. Do you think india can have a muslim president even if hr is the best? Truth is india cannot, forget muslim india cannot even have a south indian president (those who tell gowda and rao, think again). India is such a horrible mess of hypocrisy

    Muslims cannot fully blame govt for educational backwardness. Iam ready to support a muslim organization fighting to create awareness and solve economic problems, but i see more religious bigots.

    Gujarat massacre is a big blot, there might be many more like that. but you need to also see the arrogance (at times making others insecure) shown by some (many) members of your community in many parts of.india. you cannot do that forever, but if anybody try to justify killing and raping, i have sympathies.

    Please fight for your rights, not for religion. Palestine is wrong, but we have other problems to solve. A religion does not make you equal to a wealthy arab.

    ---
    Human being living in a boundary commonly known in this century as india.

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  32. Justice_Warrior, have you heard the name of AR Antulay, the one time chief minister of a state called maharashtra ? the AR stands for Abdul Rahman. of course he is not the only muslim CM in independent India.

    for a person who is ignorant about the basics of Indian politics and internal situation, you sure do raise a racket.
    time to remove those blinkers perhaps ?

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  33. The last census showed that minorities in India are better educated than the majority. The only minority lagging behind was the Muslims. While the other minority like Jains, Xians, Sikhs encouraged education, the Muslims did not. India is the land of opportunity. Anyone can become anyone, if you work hard. If Muslims cannot seize opportunities, then it is their fault.

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  34. Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Kya aap Musalmaan hain?":

    I guess in the Pakistani imagination, the country is the product of the efforts of *all* Muslims of the sub-continent. Hence, in a sense, being Muslim and Indian are incompatible. (Of course, not all Pakistanis think this way but I suppose enough do.) A Muslim who also claims to be Indian thus poses a problem.

    The late Pakistani Brigadier Siddiq Salik - he who wrote the wonderful "Witness to Surrender" - had a wonderful way of addressing this problem in a later book about his experience as an Indian Prisoner-of-War. According to him, all Muslims in Indian fall into one of two categories:

    (1) Those who are deeply unhappy in India and who long to escape to Pakistan,

    (2) If a Muslim doesn't fall into category (1), then he/she has been "brainwashed" by the Hindus.

    Problem solved, as they say. Brigadier Salik, incidentally, was killed in the same plane crash that also killed General Zia-ul-haq.

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  35. Anirban has left a new comment on your post "Kya aap Musalmaan hain?":

    It is a question of ignorance. Pakistanis in India might get asked some peculiar questions with respect to their country too.

    I applaud you both for doing your best to present your point of view to people who have never seen an Indian Muslim before.

    Your blog is now my favorite out of the scores I read regularly.

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  36. Anirban, much thanks :) For some reason your comment got rejected by blogger/other forces :) Hence copy-pasted it...

    Anonymous, must read up more on Brigadier Salik...

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  37. Came across this because it showed up in an entirely unrelated Google search :) Much fun reading this.

    And it looks like "Justice warrior" disappeared entirely from the scene when he was challenged.

    I'm posting to correct "Anonymous May 15, 2010 12:52 PM" on one statement: "india cannot even have a south indian president." Without even looking up a full list of Indian presidents since independence, I can give you three names of South Indians who made it to that chair: Neelam Sanjiva Reddy (from Andhra Pradesh), VV Giri (from Andhra Pradesh), and KR Narayanan (from Kerala). That's 15 years out of 61 years of being a republic, so 25% of the time, and spread out over the decades ranging form the 60s to the 90s. So what hypocrisy are you talking about here?

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